An Older Man

 

 

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Sue loved older men of power. Potbellied, balding, limp as a noodle, she

didn't care. In fact, the less adequate in love-making such men seemed,

the better she could manipulate them, playing up to their shaky egos.

She was perpetually on the hunt for professors or graduate students who

she believed could supply her with things she wanted.

 

Most of the college kids she'd dated lacked many of the essentials she

needed, cars to drive her places in, apartments where she could crash

regularly or hold her parties, or cash she could borrow and not pay

back.

 

But professors, even better than graduate students, had a place in the

world, a position of authority on campus, and resources she could use.

Part of this change of focus may have also been boredom. Sue likely

didn't get a kick from the boys she dated, most of them falling into the

same, predictable pattern of behavior once she began to wring them dry,

she could use. Part of this change of focus may have also been boredom.

Sue likely didn't get a kick from the boys she dated, most of them

falling into th

 

And for the most part, securing the affections of her fellow students

seemed no challenge at all, they were already a ball of throbbing

hormones needing very little encouragement. Sex with them -- when she

could not avoid that aspect of her game -- began to take on a sameness

she could no longer stand, each boy's reaction to her largely the same.

She could have made-love to the same man over and over for all the

difference it made, putting a new mask on each. The fun part for Sue

seemed to be the build up, that tension of desire, and how she could

peak it, and -- after having started her seduction practices in high

school -- Sue already knew what to expect from most men. Later in places

like Hellfire (called the Vault when reopened), Sue would later learn to

spice up sex with kinky routines, and in fact, would learn that she

didn't have to put out most of the time at all, teasing men to the point

of madness without ever giving them what they wanted.

 

Only men with power later got anything out of her, men who could help

her up the ladder of success, giving her the publishing credits she

needed. And even a few of them she would tease to distraction, laughing

over their limp penises the way she laughed over Doug's.

 

In college, Sue may have begun that climb, clinging to stiff or limp

penis to pull herself up towards some goal only she could envision,

modeling herself after Valerie Solaras and Abbie Hoffman, learning that

as a beautiful woman revolutionary she could achieve more than either.

She once told Nicole that she had "empowered" herself through her

explicit sexuality, and routinely spewed a "crazy feminist rap" about

her sex acts. This rap would later reemerge in "Red Light," as if a sign

of her growing desperation as a go-go dancer, rather than the

well-rehearsed and calculated diatribe. Ron Goldberg saw her as "a sort

of pro-porn feminist" who never got taken too seriously.

 

"[This had] something to do with being blond and being a bit

exhibitionist," Goldberg told Joel.

 

Older men, however, were nothing new to Sue. She had dated 40-year-old

men since high school, perhaps earlier, and had certainly accompanied

some of these to classic Manhattan sex clubs such as Plato's Retreat --

one of the man such places to emerge out of the Free Love Sixties where

men and women couldcertainly accompanied some of these to classic

Manhattan sex clubs such as Plato's Retreat -- one of the man such

places to emerge out of the Free Love Sixties where men and women could

meet and fuck in a public forum, often leading to great orgies. While

such places were extremely popular in the early 1970s, time made them

sleazier, and less like public love-making than public prostitution. As

with many of the chat lines now available in the age of AIDS, fewer and

fewer women engaged in this public display. Management, in a panic to

maintain its male clientele, began to hire prostitutes to fill in the

shrinking ra

 

Goldberg erroneously blamed himself for Sue's connection with the New

York sex industry, because after college, he had worked as a production

assistant on a porno film, allowing Sue an opportunity to slip into the

scene. But even he, as close as he was to Sue, did not know Sue had

already a decade's worth of experience by that time, much of that coming

by way of mid-1970s trips to Plato's Retreat and other clubs of that

nature.

 

"She used to tell me about it when she got back to school," one school

chum said. "How when she was in high school, she used to let older men

take her. But she would never tell us what went on there. She would only

tell us how cool it was, but wouldn't speculate. She would go on and one

about how shocked she was."

 

Her club trips included visits to The Mine Shaft, Club O, the Chateau,

the Castle, LaScenes and numerous other less well-known public sex clubs

throughout Manhattan. But the most famous of these, and the place where

she met many of the contacts that would later plunge her deeper into the

New York sex industry and supply her with the raw material for "Red

Light" was Hellfire, whose name was for a time called the Vault, and

later, when it reopened in the 1990s, was known as the Vault again.

 

Sue used to say how she had been seduced into going to such places at

16-year-old, how she now -- in 1982 -- couldn't untangle herself from

that life."

 

By the end of college, Sue had already met Dave Nesor, one of the

principle figures in the 1980s sex scene, the publisher of numerous S&M

and Adult publications, using him to swing onto yet more clubs

throughout the city.

 

"She was well-known as a dominant in that world," Goldberg said of her

later, "and seemed to know everyone."

 

Sue was also writing for Screw Magazine by this time, as a base of

operations.

 

"She was a hard-edged blonde who feigned a heart of gold," one bitter

boyfriend said.

 

By the time she neared graduation, you could see the predatory look in

her eyes, unable to find satisfaction in mere classmates, always hungry

for something, always claiming she was just barely making ends meet.

Glen later claimed Sue struggled with "the nine to five" thing. While

she made good money working temporary office jobs, she would seek the

sex whenever one of those jobs failed, though she wasn't above using sex

to keep jobs or get better treatment from her bosses. At a delicatessen

on Union Avenue in Totowa, she seduced the owner, driving him into

divorce. In Willowbrook Mall, she used her boyfriend, Danny Kling to

keep her job open, even though she often wandered away from it. He would

hire her back each time she requested, much to the rage of others who

had by that time much more seniority. And all the time, she screwed

Danny's boss as well.

 

While Sue still slept with men for favors, her price rose and so did her

selection of men. She sought older men now, not here students. Dan, the

lawyer, whose Belleville apartment, she trashed with a party, bought her

a car. But she didn't always have to sleep with men to get what she

wanted -- and actually preferred getting what she wanted based on

promises. Nor did she take as many risks as her life-style seemed to

indicate.

 

"She was very selective," one friend said. "She would promise you

everything, but keeping you dangling. Sometimes the time wouldn't be

right. Sometimes she would be in one of her fugue states. She was a

mistress of anticipation."

 

Even when she had sex, it was more performance than any act of love. She

repeated over and over again, the routines she was then performing in

New York at Show World, feeding the dirty old men's fantasy's for a

quarter a minute.

 

"Her sex was teasing, not sweat," said one friend. "That's how come she

like doing that dominatrix bit. Where else would she get people begging

to touch her and she could tell them: `No way.'"

 

Glen Kenny told Joel Lewis later that Sue actually "feigned indifference

to sex." Bill Madaras claimed she constantly hit on other men.

Sometimes, she would stall sex by telling a man she still needed to

settle an affair with another man, let her former lover down easy before

she could engage in the act, and yet, each man was filled with "undying

attraction."

 

By far, Sue's most dramatic conquest on campus came just before she was

ready to graduate. I had taken a semester off to deal with my own

problems at home, only to return to find Sue hard at work at a most

surprising victim.

 

Many of the professors who taught at William Paterson at that time,

recall it with some fondness.

 

"Indeed, many WPC professors recall the early 80s as the close of a

tumultuous, but exciting period at the school," wrote Joel Lewis in his

unpublished manuscript. "Once, an almost all-female teacher's college,

it expanded into a multipurpose liberal arts school... As the school

hired its expanded faculty in the late 60s, many of the young professors

were left-wing political and culturally libertine. In 1974, the Student

Center opened and -- with it -- the Billy Pat Pub, which was legally

able to serve 18 year olds at that time. Some people claimed that WPC

stood for We Party Constantly."

 

"I miss that period," professor Stanley Wertheim told Joel. "Although

Susan and her friend often cut my classes, I gave them good grades for

the times they did show up. They were exceptional students. Now most of

my students are sweet young girls who love children and want to be

teachers. It's boring now."

 

For Wertheim -- who became one of Sue's most important college victims

-- this was indeed an understatement.

 

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Stanley's Curse

 

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