Happy Harry’s discount hospital
You have an ailment and you don’t know what to do?
Let Happy Harry’s Discount Hospital look you over.
We’re the cheapest joint in town.
We have a staff of happy imported doctors who have seen everything and can do the most complicated operations in twenty minutes or else.
White doctors, of course, don’t take care of ordinary people now a days because they are too busy on making money off rich clients, but never you mind, most of our doctors are better doctors anyway, even if they don’t speak English
No waiting in a cold emergency room, either
No spending unneeded hospital time in recovery. If you’re not ready to leave, too bad.
We’ll get you in and out just like that.
No insurance plan?
Our prices are so low that even the Republican dominated Federal government is willing to pay them, provided our death rate remains acceptably low.
If you have no insurance, we guarantee that your family will be able to pay off a single operation in one generation provided all of your family members are employed.
This is a much better rate than most white American doctors would charge, since you would likely have to sell your grandchildren into slavery to make certain those doctors have enough to get into the country club of their choice.
We, of course, will deduct weekly from your pay check, even if you are an illegal alien, and still leave you enough to have your family avoid starvation.
And if you have no job?
We take trade ins at the highest rate.
Any spare kidney, liver or heart, no matter what the condition, no questions asked.
What’s this: terminally ill.
No problem, we’ll put you out of your misery as fast as possible. No more lingering around for moths or years. No more being hooked up to complicated machines just so we can charge you an arm and a leg before you actually transpire.
We won’t even make you lose your hair – unless, of course, you wish to sell it.
No little needle and the deed to your home and presto, you’re dead.
So come to Happy Harry’s Discount Hospital and see all the wonderful things we can do for you.
Or call for a free estimate.