Lennyís last word

(Short script)

 

SCENE: A doctorís office

Bill is buttoning up his shirt after an examination as doctor fills out the form,

 

Bill:

††††††††††† Well, Doc?

††††††††††† Whatís the good word?

††††††††††† Is this something I should worry about?

 

DOCTOR:

††††††††††† Nothingís wrong with the kidney as far as I can see.

 

BILL:

††††††††††† Then why I am up ten times a night to take a pee?

 

DOCTOR:

††††††††††† Have you been drinking a lot lately?

 

BILL:

††††††††††† I had one drink.

††††††††††† I know Iím not supposed to but I couldnít resist

 

DOC:

††††††††††† And now youíre feeling guilty because you have your best friendís kidney?

 

BILL:

††††††††††† Not exactly, Doc.

††††††††††† Lenny was a pain in the ass when he was a live.

††††††††††† He always had to have the last work about everything.

 

DOC:

††††††††††† So what does this have to do with the kidney?

 

BILL:

††††††††††† Lenny hated how much I drank.

††††††††††† He kept telling me ďitís going to kill you some day.Ē

 

DOC:

††††††††††† He must have cared about you to offer to give you his kidney.

 

BILL:

††††††††††† He wasnít being kind.

††††††††††† He was just showing me how right he was

††††††††††† And that pissed me off.

 

DOC:

††††††††††† People donít generally give up a kidney to make a point

 

BILL:

††††††††††† You donít know Lenny.

††††††††††† He would have cut off an arm to win an argument.

 

DOC:

††††††††††† Is that why you refused to take his kidney at first?

 

BILL:

††††††††††† Damned right

††††††††††† I wasnít going to let that song of a bitch get over on me.

††††††††††† I told him the only way Iíd take his kidney if he was dead.

 

DOC:

††††††††††† If he hadnít run his car into that tree, you wouldnít be here now.

 

BILL:

††††††††††† I know I ought to be grateful.

††††††††††† But I canít help thinking Lennyís getting over on me somehow.

 

DOC:

††††††††††† How is that possible? Lennyís dead.

 

BILL:

††††††††††† Think about it, Doc.

††††††††††† One drink and Iím peeing like a horse

 

DOC:

††††††††††† So?

 

BILL:

††††††††††† Itís Lennyís kidney telling me to stop.

††††††††††† Leave it to that son of a bitch to get in the last word

††††††††††† Even after heís freakiní dead!


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